So what was the blue minivan thinking?

The driver must have seen my bike well over to the right side of the road but still in front of him. I’m wearing a bright yellow shirt and an orange safety vest – I’m so bright, you can see me through your eyelids.

A right turn lane opens, which I center down.

So what was going on in that suburban-fluff, middle-class-distracted, attentioned-deprived brain of yours that you think that pulling ALONG SIDE me and then slowly merging INTO ME was a good idea? Why not just stay behind me – I’m doing about 20mph and it will cost you no more than a couple of seconds – to let me clear the lane forward so you can make your right?

That slap on your roof caught your attention, didn’t it? Jerked back into your lane like a newspaper-smacked puppy. Then you slowed down (and blocked the through lane) rather than initially slowing and entering the lane behind me.

How many hours have you been driving? More than most airline pilots fly?

Is there some excuse that makes it okay for you? Distracted? Tired? I’m in your way and you’re bigger? You have detachable Christian ethics?

You’re just a dumbshit?

I just don’t know what goes on in your head, how you can do that to others and not look in the mirror and see the shit that you are. The next time that sort of thing happens, maybe I’ll get your plate and run it through a PI. No locked doors then.

Some people.

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