It’s an empty office. Mid-level guys like me can’t use it. There aren’t any managers who want it. Its windows are dirty and it’s filled with old filing drawers, a bent shelf and a dead mini-fridge. Paperclips and push-pins litter the floor.

Now, I used to keep my bike in my pod area, back in the early days when I was alone here. Just leaned it nearby while I worked. Then civilization came. The pods filled. It became noisy, crowded. Crime increased. My bike parking spot went to a contractor. So I rolled the bike into the office and leaned it against the abandoned furniture.

Turns out one of the contractors who lives in temporary quarters three miles away was inspired by me. He started bringing in his bike. So now there are two parked in the dead office.

Kinda cool.

But of course, a manager (not mine, just one who has an office nearby) has taken offense at this brilliant show of commitment to alternative commuting. Whenever he passes the office, he closes the door with a miffy little slam. The other night, I fetched my water bottle from the bike, walked 100 feet to the sink to fill it, heard the door slam shut again. I’m trying to get ready to leave – I don’t need to open and close the door every time I take something in there.

And what is this about? What can he possibly be mad about? He has no problem with a bunch of office junk, but mix in a few bikes and its… obscene? subversive?

There are few finer examples of beautiful engineering that a bike. It is slender and slick, all function. It can accelerate a man to 20 mph on muscle-power alone, and carry him great distances. Besides trains, bikes are one of the most civilized forms of transportation.

Slam.

Punch line: this guy drives an fuv.

Addendum: Today, while the manager closed the door, he looked over and explained that he didn’t think it was good to have bikes visible in an office setting. I might not agree with his POV (if anything, they should put a bike rack right in the main lobby, just to show off how   green    we are). But I’ll give the guy credit for at least finally saying something to me about this.

He still drives an fuv. Boo. Hiss.