Squirrelly Retyrement

Squirrelly Retyrement

oday was my last day at FedEx. It’s been twenty years (counting in my contractor time) and it’s been a hell of a ride. I’ve gone through a number of managers and made more friends than I realized. So today was the going-away party.

I was thinking it would be maybe some sheet cake and a dozen mooching well-wishers. Ended up with a large packed conference room with two orgs, a bunch of returning retirees, cake (yes, but still), food, drinks, a plaque, speeches, roasts, handshakes, hugs. Two hours of this.

It was a choke-up moment that went on and on.

It was one of those life-validation moments when you are actually thanked for the things you’ve done and the efforts you made. People brought up both funny moments and professional moments. Three directors spoke about me (one of them called me a pain in the ass).

Even building management showed up – been laughing with these guys in the back halls and loading dock for years. How egalitarian is that?

And this comes after a long week of saying my goodbyes, including my wonderful offshore team in Pune, India getting me a railroad pocket watch, gifts of everything from desktop holders to drinking glasses, a great team-effort t-shirt (“My old team still misses me but their aim is getting better”) (and on the back, “Retired Scrummy Bear”, in honor of my years as a scrum master), of lunches with the crazy ladies down in a west Orlando ethnic hash house to the a small lunch with the team telling me they’d really miss me. I mean, how long can I go on just breaking things with commas to show the sheer volume of good-will I received?

My plaque said it all. It summed it up as follows:

With our Greatest Appreciation

We Hereby Honor

Robert Raymond


Throughout your 20 years of service

you have been not only a co-worker

and mentor, but a friend to many.

You have set an example to be followed

in the future and cherished by those of us

that were fortunate enough to have

experienced it for ourselves

We are going to miss you!

Happy Retirement!


My sole shout-out must go to the org’s admin, Kate Ludvigsen, who made this all come together. She’s like a coke-crazed Tinkerbell, and I’ll miss our morning pleasantries (“Screw you”) before the workplace came alive.

And yeah, the after-party at the Silly Grape was something special too. Nothing like mixing drinks and showing the millennials how to risk a spew.

Again, thanks for all for that wonderful send-off.

The old dogs: L-R; Joe, Keith, LeaAnn, Marilyn, Numbie, Bequi and Bob (photo credit: Tinkerbell)